Wednesday, December 12, 2012

The 12th of Never

I remember a couple I knew a long time ago chose to get married on 12-12.  There is an expression for something you're never actually planning to do, so you say you'll do it on the 12th of Never.  They had been dating for years and never thought they'd wed, but when they did they chose "the 12th of Never."

I guess today, 12-12-12, is about as 12th of Never as you can get.

I *never* thought I'd self-publish a novel.  Sure, I knew I'd write another novel someday.  I'd completed my last one (entitled The Music Box) when I was 15 years old and since then I've stuck to short stories, blogs and poetry.  I was busy with school, raising a family, building a career...but I knew someday that would change.  I'd be inspired again.  I'd have that drive again.

Despite that, I clung to the notion that my writing was for ME.  I was always reticent to share my work with others because I wasn't a big fan of criticism.  My ego just wasn't strong enough to take it.  But then I started blogging 4 years ago and I've heard criticism about everything from my fat thighs to my being self-absorbed to having my parenting skills called into question to some just thinking I'm not that talented of a writer.  Over two thousand posts later I realized something important: I can't please everyone but I do resonate with some readers and I've established a following of 1500+.  I've gotten tons of emails through the years thanking me for writing the words my readers felt in their heart.  That's good enough for me to realize that I have something worth sharing.

Once I got over the fact that yes, I could have others read my work and...*gasp* NOT LIKE IT, then I had these grandiose notions of finding a literary agent and publishing my work with a reputable traditional author.  I would certainly not self-publish.  I wanted to be vetted.  I wanted to be a *real* author. Somewhere along the line I got over that when I realized how eager some people were to read my work.  And I'm not against having it traditionally published at some point, but for right now, I just want to get it out there, make it available to readers, see my little bird take flight and leave the nest.

So here, today, on the 12th of Never, I'm sharing my little bird with you, a little piece of my soul.  I hope you will enjoy it.  And now that it's released, I think I can, with a clear conscience and renewed spirit, really get down to business on Book 2: Mountains Climbed.

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