Wednesday, April 3, 2013

pissed off all over again

Last year I wrote a post about a question on OKCupid, the dating site. It has two variations, one asking about men and one asking about women, but basically it poses the question "Is someone who's slept with 100 people a bad person?"


Misogynistic much?
In my previous address of this topic, I'd expressed outrage at the people who had answered this question in the affirmative. I mean, really, how the hell can someone determine a person's intrinsic value by the number of sexual partners they have had? Furthermore, where is the magic line? If I have slept with 99 men, I'm okay but as soon as I hit triple digits I become the spawn of Satan? It just makes no sense whatsoever to me.

How good of a person you are to me depends on altruism and kindness, not sexual behavior.There are bad people in the world who are virgins. There are awesome people who have fucked thousands. How you choose to express yourself sexually *probably* has nothing to do with how good of a person you are (non-consensual acts excluded, of course.)

BUT, I have to say that the opinion expressed by the OKCupid member above probably makes me even more angry. Essentially, it's the traditional view that men who are very experienced sexually are studs whereas women who are are very experienced are gutter trash whores.

Holy fuck does this type of misogynistic bullshit piss me off. I can't even formulate a coherent argument except for this thought: I hope every lock this asshat's key encounters stays locked the hell up tight.


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8 comments:

  1. AnonymousApril 3, 2013 at 7:47 AM

    I used to be on that site. I left it because I didn't like how it was set up...seemed kind of gay. Im now on Plenty of Fish.

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    Replies
    1. Phoebe AlexanderApril 3, 2013 at 8:48 AM

      I found POF to be even worse, at least in my area. It doesn't have match questions like OKC but the quality of the guys in my area was even lower than OKC and trust me, that's scraping the bottom of the barrel!

      Delete
  2. Maple Syrup LandApril 3, 2013 at 9:38 AM

    I have given up on all dating sites...I would rather die alone than subject myself to anymore online douchecanoes

    And agreed...this double standard that a guy sleeps with 100 women is a stud/a woman that sleeps with 100 men is a slut is ridiculous and annoying as hell

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    Replies
    1. Phoebe AlexanderApril 3, 2013 at 9:52 AM

      Honestly I think what is driving it these days is that men are too afraid that experienced women will find their sexual skills sorely lacking.

      Delete
    2. BrianApril 3, 2013 at 11:54 AM

      if that's the case then they need to suck it up and focus on improving. I know a wonderful little blog post about doing just that ;)

      Delete
    3. Phoebe AlexanderApril 3, 2013 at 6:30 PM

      I'm sure you do, Brian ;)

      Delete
  3. AnonymousApril 8, 2013 at 8:04 AM

    I personally like to reply with "A sharpener that sharpens many pencils is a good sharpener, but a pencil that's been sharpened too many times is useless" :) It tends to shut them up. \

    -cute_n_nerdy (i.e., kelsey)

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